


Since You've Been Gone (i've been falling apart)

by Sleepless_in_Starbucks



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Crying, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Nightmares Mention, Sleep Deprivation, Virgil Logan and Janus are mentioned but not really there, Worry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:14:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24134911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleepless_in_Starbucks/pseuds/Sleepless_in_Starbucks
Summary: It’s been a week. It’s been a week and Patton’s not sure how much longer he can take this.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 11
Kudos: 83





	Since You've Been Gone (i've been falling apart)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for tumblr @art-chive for getting first place in the visual half of a meter of space! prompt: any ship with "I've been falling apart (without you)" // "You know i'll always be there to catch you"

Patton wasn’t doing okay. Patton hadn’t been doing okay for a few days- if he was being honest, Patton hadn’t been doing okay for a week.

Because it was on Sunday that Roman had disappeared into the Imagination, off to fight some villain or find some figment, promising Patton he’d be back Monday. Patton wouldn’t even notice he’d been gone, Roman promised, to which Patton replied he always noticed when his prince was away. And Roman had laughed and kissed him and told him he’d be back soon.

And now it was Monday. Not the Monday Roman had promised he’d come back, no- the Monday after that one.

So Patton wasn’t doing okay.

At first, he had been fine. Worried, but fine. It wasn’t exactly unlike Roman to be back a day or two late, so when Roman didn’t show up when he said he would, Patton had managed to convince himself all was fine. Roman was just running a little late, that was all.

And then Tuesday had come and gone, Roman still nowhere to be found, and Patton was officially worried.

The others had tried to help and distract him, with board games and movie nights and family dinners and any other activities they could find, but it only worked so much. They couldn’t stop Patton from constantly glancing towards Roman’s room, waiting for his prince to emerge, couldn’t stop Patton from getting distracted by his own thoughts of where Roman could be, couldn’t stop Patton from missing him no matter what they were doing.

The days were hard enough, trying to stay in the moment and focus on Virgil and Logan and Janus instead of Roman and Roman’s room and Where Was Roman, but the nights were worse by a mile. His bed was empty and cold, and it was always his- normally, he and Roman would switch off who’s room they slept in night per night, but now, it was always Patton’s bed- always Patton’s Roman-less bed.

And now… it was Monday. A week since Roman should have been home, a week since Patton should’ve been able to hug Roman and hold him and kiss him, a week since Patton had last been doing anything close to okay.

Patton wasn’t sure where the others were, but he didn’t care either. He hadn’t cared about anything much since Saturday. He was tired, restless nights spent tossing and turning and looking for a warmth that wasn’t there until he woke up sweating and shaking from nightmares trying to tell him why that warmth was gone having drained him of what little energy he still had. He was tired and he was lonely and he just wanted Roman to be home.

Right then, he was curled up in an armchair, sipping at tea that had long since gone cold. He had made it in an attempt to warm himself up, but it was the wrong type of warm and it did little good against the numbness in his chest. He knew he should move, go to his room and get some work done, but he didn’t want to move. It was easier to sit and wallow and think about how the chair was made for one but it was so much nicer to sit in with two.

Before he could try and force himself to get up, however, Patton was drawn out of his thoughts by the sound of a door opening. He glanced back towards the hallway, but he couldn’t tell what door had opened. It was probably just one of the others.

But it could also be-

Flighty, useless, head-strong hope fluttered in his chest and Patton pushed himself out of the chair, dropping his cold tea on the coffee table as he headed towards the hallway. Despite the fact that he knew it was unlikely, he couldn’t help but entertain hope, entertain the thought that it was Roman, that it was Roman and he was okay and he was here and he was home and he was-

Lost in his thoughts, Patton didn’t notice the book on the floor, likely left there by Logan or Janus. His foot caught on it and he tripped, unable to catch himself as he headed for the floor…

...but he never hit it.

Instead, arms, warm arms, _familiar_ warm arms caught him, wrapping underneath his own and giving him back the balance he had just lost. Above him, the owner of the arms chuckled, a sound that was still as musical as it was the first time Patton had heard it, even more so now. “I know that you’ve fallen for me, dearheart, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it literally.”

Though by then Patton knew who it was that was holding him- he’d know his prince anywhere and anytime- he still jerked his head up, desperate to be sure, to know this wasn’t a trick or a dream or a nightmare. But it wasn’t, and Roman was there, smiling softly and charmingly and looking a little dirty and a little tired but he was there, he was really there and holding Patton and Patton was holding him and he was  _ there _ .

Patton threw himself at Roman as well as he could, arms wrapping around Roman’s chest and holding him as close as possible, burying his face against Roman’s neck and trying to take in as much of every single aspect of Roman as he could, as if letting go for even a second would cause him to vanish like a mirage. Roman returned the embrace barely a moment after Patton had initiated it, cradling Patton and allowing him to hold as close as he wanted.

“Hey, sunshine, it’s okay.” Roman murmured softly, teasing tone replaced for one that was tender and caring. He started to move his hands over Patton’s back, trying to soothe him, and Patton realized he had started shaking. “I’m here, I’m okay, we’re okay.”

“I’ve been falling apart.” Patton blurted out, meaning to make it a joke, a pun, a play on his fall, but he couldn’t do it, because it was true, he had been falling apart and he had been so worried and afraid and lonely without Roman and-

“Oh, come now, Pat,” Roman said, tone light yet sincere, “you know I’ll always be there to catch you.”

And despite the fact that Roman had clearly meant that to be comforting, Patton still started crying. Not because he was upset, of course, but because Roman was here and close and Roman  _ was going to catch him every time he fell _ and really the only proper response to all the pent up fear and worry and sudden happiness was to sob into his beloved’s shoulder.

“Oh, shh, it’s okay, love, you can cry, it’s okay, come on, let’s sit down, okay? I love you, it’s okay, you’re okay, shh.” Roman said, continuing to softly reassure Patton even as he moved them over to the couch. The minute they were seated, Patton shifted so that he was in Roman’s lap, still holding tight to Roman as he continued to cry and Roman continued to comfort him.

Eventually, Patton sobs died off, and he pulled away from Roman’s shoulder. Roman smiled at him once more, all charm and soft edges. “Hey there, teddy bear.” Roman said, eliciting a small giggle from Patton. “How are you feeling?”

Patton didn’t answer at first, instead choosing to hold Roman’s face in both his hands, cupping his cheeks and looking over his face as if he was trying to memorize it forever. “I missed you.” He said, simply, knowing that Roman would hear all the hidden meaning behind those simple three words without him having to explain them.

Roman placed a hand over one of Patton’s. “I know, sweetheart.” He said apologetically. “I got caught up fighting some nightmares and lost my way. I didn’t mean to worry you so.”

“You should’ve taken someone with you.” Patton said as he leaned forward, pressing a kiss against Roman’s forehead. “Virgil would’ve been willing to go if you told him you really needed his help.” He kissed both sides of Roman’s face. “Logan still has his spear from the last time he accidentally got caught up in the Imagination.” He moved his hands so he could kiss Roman’s cheeks too. “I would’ve come if you had let me.”

“I know, I-” Roman laughed a little as Patton kissed his chin, “angel, you know I can’t think when you’re kissing me.”

Patton kissed Roman’s nose. “I have a whole week’s worth of kisses to make up for.” Patton told him, pausing for a moment so that he could tuck a stray strand of Roman’s hair behind his ear, staring into Roman’s eyes while he was at it. “No offense, honey, but I’m not going to stop so that you can think.”

“Oh, so cruel, lovebug.” Roman teased before he leaned forward, using the fact that Patton had been distracted by his eyes to steal himself a proper kiss. As soon as he realized what was happening, Patton returned the gesture, arms moving to wrap around the back of Roman’s neck as he kissed back, trying to make up for every kiss he had lost while Roman was away.

“I’m sorry I was gone so long.” Roman said when they finally broke apart, Patton resting his forehead against Roman’s, still holding him close.

“I know.” Patton told him, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of Roman’s lips. “And I forgive you. Just… don’t do it again?”

Roman’s arms tightened where they were wrapped around Patton’s waist. “Never.” He promised, tone solemn, and Patton nodded, content as he turned his head and rested it against Roman’s shoulder, letting out a small yawn as he did so.

“Good.” He said, snuggling against Roman, ignoring as his prince chuckled.

“I think it’s bedtime, for you, my heart.” Roman said, shifting his hold on Patton so that he was cradling him against his chest as he stood. Patton didn’t have any protest, only snuggling in closer to Roman’s chest as he began to drift off, sleep finally willing to return peacefully to him now that Roman was safe and Patton was the right kind of warm. He didn’t even need to open his eyes to know Roman had taken them into his room, the familiarity of it not having faded in the week Roman had been gone.

He did stir, however, when Roman placed him down on his bed and retreated. Almost immediately, Patton was sitting up blinking in the dark room and reaching out blindly for Roman. “Roman? Baby? Don’t leave me please-”

Someone caught one of his hands, holding it in theirs, and Patton calmed, leaning towards Roman as he got into bed as well. “Hush, love, it’s alright, I just had to put your glasses away.”

Patton nodded a bit but, in all honesty, he didn’t care why Roman had been gone for a moment, only caring that he was there now. He once more pressed against Roman’s chest as his prince laid them both down, holding Patton and allowing him to cuddle as close as he wanted.

Although it was light, Patton could feel Roman plant a kiss against the top of his head, murmuring, “There you go, darling, it’s alright now. You can rest. I’ll still be here when you wake, I promise.”

And knowing that was one promise nothing could stop Roman from keeping, Patton relaxed against him, falling asleep surrounded by the warmth he hoped he’d never have to miss again.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr at @sleepless-in-starbucks


End file.
